A day of new things
Today was a day of new things for me, or at least a day of realization of new things; some good, some bad.
I'll start off with the bad: Tequiza beer. Don't be fooled, this beer is _not_ the light tasty summer beer that it pretends to be. Damn marketing people. They put it in the cooler right next to Corona, a delightful beer, and sell it as "Beer With Blue Agave Nectar And The Natural Flavor Of Lime." Beware this beer! It tastes as though someone took half a can of old-ass Tecate, about two cups of sugar, and a cup of that nasty lemon/lime juice that comes in a fake fruit-like looking containers and mixed it together in an old dirty Sunny Delight bottle. Oh yeah, it's that good. I'm not really sure why I bought it anyway. I think it's because I wanted Corona but was too lazy to cut up limes. Actually, thinking back on it, I'm pretty sure that was the reason. Well, I've learned my lesson... Oh, and just when I thought the beer couldn't get any worse, I read the label on the bottle, and noticed the words "Anheuser-Busch, Inc". Those lying, deceiving, tasteless bastards from Missouri. It's a good thing that Indiana still, by far, wins the all-time shittiest state contest, or Missouri might be in the running.
On a slightly geekier note, I downloaded and tried out Fedora Core 4 today. Actually, I'm using it to type this blog right now. It's clean, has some nice apps/tools, and has an impressive changelog. I need to poke at more of the details, but so far it looks good.
My last item for the day comes from the land of television... As I'm sure you've all noticed, you can't watch more than a few minute's worth of television without seeing an add for a new drug. What used to be Nike and Chevrolet commercials has now turned to Celebrex and Viagra. I'm not saying that this is good or bad, although I don't really care for commercials starring impotent men, but I do find some of them to be hilarious. It started off a few years ago with the long list of possible side effects. You know, may cause stuffy nose, blurry vision, anal leakage, bleeding eyes, etc. Makes me want to run out and start popping pills right away! Anyway, I heard a commercial tonight for a drug called Premarin, "for menopausal symptoms." The disclaimer for this particular drug was absolutely hilarious. I don't mean to be insensitive to anyone who has had to live through the disclaimer that I'm about to mention, but come on, get real. "For women who have a uterus, estrogen may increase risk for uterine cancer." Does that seem odd to anyone else? That's like saying "for men who have a heart, crack-cocaine and Red Bull may increase risk of heart attack." Do they really have to go into this level of detail for a 30-second commercial? Are they really so enthralled as to state the obvious? Who is honestly dumb enough to take this drug and miss the obvious; that not having a uterus qualifies them as being void of uterine cancer! Need I start a conversation about Darwinism? Again? Holy shit people, we're way past the age of enlightenment, so start acting like it.
I'll start off with the bad: Tequiza beer. Don't be fooled, this beer is _not_ the light tasty summer beer that it pretends to be. Damn marketing people. They put it in the cooler right next to Corona, a delightful beer, and sell it as "Beer With Blue Agave Nectar And The Natural Flavor Of Lime." Beware this beer! It tastes as though someone took half a can of old-ass Tecate, about two cups of sugar, and a cup of that nasty lemon/lime juice that comes in a fake fruit-like looking containers and mixed it together in an old dirty Sunny Delight bottle. Oh yeah, it's that good. I'm not really sure why I bought it anyway. I think it's because I wanted Corona but was too lazy to cut up limes. Actually, thinking back on it, I'm pretty sure that was the reason. Well, I've learned my lesson... Oh, and just when I thought the beer couldn't get any worse, I read the label on the bottle, and noticed the words "Anheuser-Busch, Inc". Those lying, deceiving, tasteless bastards from Missouri. It's a good thing that Indiana still, by far, wins the all-time shittiest state contest, or Missouri might be in the running.
On a slightly geekier note, I downloaded and tried out Fedora Core 4 today. Actually, I'm using it to type this blog right now. It's clean, has some nice apps/tools, and has an impressive changelog. I need to poke at more of the details, but so far it looks good.
My last item for the day comes from the land of television... As I'm sure you've all noticed, you can't watch more than a few minute's worth of television without seeing an add for a new drug. What used to be Nike and Chevrolet commercials has now turned to Celebrex and Viagra. I'm not saying that this is good or bad, although I don't really care for commercials starring impotent men, but I do find some of them to be hilarious. It started off a few years ago with the long list of possible side effects. You know, may cause stuffy nose, blurry vision, anal leakage, bleeding eyes, etc. Makes me want to run out and start popping pills right away! Anyway, I heard a commercial tonight for a drug called Premarin, "for menopausal symptoms." The disclaimer for this particular drug was absolutely hilarious. I don't mean to be insensitive to anyone who has had to live through the disclaimer that I'm about to mention, but come on, get real. "For women who have a uterus, estrogen may increase risk for uterine cancer." Does that seem odd to anyone else? That's like saying "for men who have a heart, crack-cocaine and Red Bull may increase risk of heart attack." Do they really have to go into this level of detail for a 30-second commercial? Are they really so enthralled as to state the obvious? Who is honestly dumb enough to take this drug and miss the obvious; that not having a uterus qualifies them as being void of uterine cancer! Need I start a conversation about Darwinism? Again? Holy shit people, we're way past the age of enlightenment, so start acting like it.


2 Comments:
Oh no my friend, it's Oklahoma!!! You ever been through OK? First...their state saying "We're OK". That is what they say about a guy who gets guttng by a bull, through his head but somehow survives..."He's OK now." And if you are there...whatever you do, DON'T ASK where a mall is!" They will point you to a WalMart. NOT KIDDING! 3 People did that to me. I finally said..."NO NOT WALMART...Mall...Where they have many stores in one big building" They looked at me like I was nuts. DON"T EVER GO THERE!!! It's where all the dumb people go to breed and leave their off spring.
By
G13, at 9:25 AM
OK, i think you missed the point on the mini infomercial..."May increase chances" aka "if you still have one, use somethign else" I'm just saying. But then again it's right up there w/"do not insert this curling iron into and oriface..."
By
Oreo, at 4:43 PM
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